my stance on spiders is clear: they are all assholes, have no respect for private property, shows no understanding of the concept of personal space, and the numbers of legs they possess is, quite frankly, excessive
has actually talked to their parents more than once
i mean, i imagine you’d kinda have to unless you get friends
probably has considered running away on multiple occasions, hell even if their parents are chill it’d at least be interesting
will probably go wild in college. Either that or just…carry on.
all around fascinating human being
The First Born:
Elsa probably
Their internal monologue is just screaming
So filtered that no one knows what they actually think of them
genuinely good at things, but since they’re the first kid, they set the standard and they get stuck in this loop of believing they’ll never be good enough even though they’re /more/ than competent
can’t straight up tell people that they dislike them
The Middle Child:
Literally Can’t Do Anything Right
The only member of the family who’s allowed to make Mistakes
hates conflict but is simultaneously really fucking confrontational
Hasn’t felt an emotion other than :~) in three years
crafts their personality into a complete joke in anticipation of no one taking them seriously, living in a constant state of uncertainty as to whether or not their actions are genuinely ironic
The Second Child-A:
Type-A Personality
The list of things they’ve never done reads: “Gotten Less than a 96%, Fallen, Made a Fool of themselves In Public, etc.”
Superhuman
Seems suspiciously like the kind of person who reminds the teacher to give homework because they need to keep their 140% in Bio.
They don’t even need to be part of your family, they’ll still be your mom’s favorite child– you’re not even jealous, you’re just like “Same”.
The Second Child-T:
*the impossible dream plays softly from a distance*
like the Middle Child but engineered to be Better,
making it twice as devastating when they inevitably ruin everything
probably believes they’ve accidentally wronged the universe on some personal level and lives their life overcompensating for something they did when they were like 9-years-old
has been fixated on the same goal for the past 7 years
The Youngest of Three:
The Only Good One
is aware of that fact
has their life together, drinks more water than you will in your entire life, runs a twitter with more than 40k followers, and is only 8-years-old
cried for like three hours because they couldn’t draw a sunflower
so many friends, they all just kinda blur together
The Youngest in a Line of Many:
has all of the talent.
If your lucky, some of their talent will rub off on you.
also has all of the independence, and could probably beat you in an argument at any time of the day regardless of who’s right
Sometimes they’re like “I had to fistfight my brother for a sandwich once” and you think they’re joking around
they’re not joking around
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT THIS IS THE MOST ACCURATE THING EVER WRITTEN WHAT THE HECK
∟ Captain Raymond Holt ✮ “And now, a message of hope. Everything is garbage. You find something you care about, and it’s taken from you. Your colleagues, your dream job, your mango yoghurt. Never love anything. That’s the lesson.”
thefallendream 